


RJWeek : Boom You're pregnant

by SosearchingRomeo (Breakingthestandards)



Category: Romeo And Juliet - All Media Types, Romeo And Juliet - Shakespeare, Romeo et Juliette - Presgurvic
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi, Pregnancy, Short Drabbles, they're pregnant, what if
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-26
Updated: 2015-08-26
Packaged: 2018-04-17 08:28:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4659705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Breakingthestandards/pseuds/SosearchingRomeo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the Romeo and Juliet week: Boom, you're pregnant.</p><p>These are short fragments of characters telling that they are pregnant and the responses of others to this news.<br/>Order:<br/>1. Nurse<br/>2.Paris<br/>3.Tybalt<br/>4.Mercutio<br/>5.Benvolio<br/>6.Romeo<br/>7.Juliet</p>
            </blockquote>





	RJWeek : Boom You're pregnant

**Author's Note:**

> Don't take this too seriously, please.

**The Nurse**

“I don’t know how it happened. But just like boom, and I was pregnant.”

Juliet gasped.  “Nurse? At your age? But how?”

The Nurse laughed sheepishly and waved her hand. “My age? My dear, I’ve had a child before I had you, you know? I lost the poor babe, I know, it’s been years ago. But I’m not barren. Not yet. I might appear old to you but apparently….”

“So who’s the lucky man?” Juliet quickly asked, brewing with impatience.

“Well….” Nurse smiled shyly and glanced at the doorway. Peter, the Capulet’s manservant, could be seen standing there. He caught the two girls looking and quickly dashed away.

“Oh, I’m so happy for you Nurse!” Juliet threw her arms round the Nurse’s neck and hugged her close. And the Nurse just laughed and cried tears of joy. She’d be a mother again.

* * *

 

**Paris**

“It happened just like that. Boom. And I was pregnant.”

The grin that appeared after those words were said was most unsettling and those in the room, his close relatives, were eyeing him confused.

Finally Mercutio spoke up, his hand in the air. “Paris? How can this be? You’re going to be a parent?”

“Yes,” he smiled triumphantly. His teeth a row of shiny pearls. “It was done with the doctor’s help. Their… newest experiment. But it brought me richness.” He held up a few bills in his hand and his nephew groaned.

“You can’t marry Juliet in this state, Paris. You can’t!” The young Escalus protested, suddenly very concerned for young Juliet’s future.

“Oh, and why not?” Paris threw him an accusing glare. “Why wouldn’t she be delighted that our first-born will be carried by me?”

“You’re a man!” Mercutio said.

“I full-heartedly agree.” The Prince joined his nephew in the discussion with concern written all over his face. “Even if she would be married to you the child still wouldn’t be hers. Not biologically, at least.”

“Ah, what’s biology worth?” Paris spit back at them. “Besides, the other part of this child isn’t that distant of a relation to her. Fifty percent of the DNA was donated by Lady Capulet herself.”

Needless to say, Mercutio threw up.

* * *

 

**Tybalt Capulet**

“And just like that, boom, I was pregnant.”

“Tybalt. No!” Juliet’s shout was ear-piercing and Tybalt felt it shatter his bones. At the very least it had destroyed his backbone for he felt weak and a failure. To know that he had lost credibility in the eyes of the girl he valued most, the woman he had loved and protected – it was unbearable.

“I’m sorry. I’d better leave you now.”

With his head hung, Tybalt stepped outside and into the pouring rain. He didn’t feel like the mighty swordsman any longer.

He could hear Juliet plead behind him, before he closed the door. “No, Tybalt. Come back.”

In front of him stood the culprit who put him in this disposition, and held out a cloak to him. “She knows now.” Tybalt said, accepting the dark piece of cloth to hide underneath and seek shelter from the rain, at least a little.

“You’re not weak.” His partner said.

A small pained smile curved Tybalt’s lips. “No. But I don’t feel like a man anymore.”

“Are you kidding?” The other replied with a cheeky grin. “You’ll always be my man. Child in tummy or no.”

“I hate you, Escalus.”

“You may.” And Mercutio kissed his lips.

* * *

 

 

**Mercutio Escalus**

They were panting, their breath mingling, as they came down from their climax. Then suddenly Mercutio threw the covers aside and pushed his lover away. He ran into the direction of the bathroom but swayed when he noticed he wouldn’t make it in time. Instead, he hung his head over the bucket that functioned as the bin and threw up.

“Fuck. Fuck, I knew we had to use protection.” He cursed.

“Protection? What are you talking about?” His lover sat up, looking confused.

Mercutio just pointed at himself and realization dawned.

When a week later Mercutio had come home with a pregnancy test and was caught by his uncle he had to explain. He cursed when he saw Benvolio arrive.

“Hey Merc, did you forget we’d go to the theatre tonight or….” His voice trailed off.

“Benvolio.” The Prince said, standing in front of a very tired-looking, red-rimmed eyes, over-lectured Mercutio. “Is this him?” The Prince asked his nephew, but Mercutio shook his head and he turned back to Benvolio again. “There’s something you need to know. You might wish to sit down.”

Benvolio sat down.

“Listen. Mercutio here had you all fooled, but there’s no need to hide it any longer.” The Prince started.

“Hey, is that a pregnancy test?” Benvolio’s eyes grew large. “My God. Did you finally lay with a woman?” His eyes betrayed hurt rather than happiness at his exclamation.

Mercutio shook his head.

“No, Benvolio. Mercutio is a woman.” The Prince said.

Silence for a moment. Then Benvolio, who was gripping the arms of the chair he was seated on hard, managed to speak.

“Mercutio, but how?”

“More like boom. And I was pregnant.”

At this moment the doors opened to reveal Tybalt who was panting heavily and had run very fast. He and Mercutio locked eyes and suddenly it was clear to them all what had occurred.

“I think,” Benvolio said. “I think we need to talk. ALL of us.”

* * *

 

 

**Benvolio Montague**

Surrounded by a group of women, Benvolio told his tale.

“I’m not shy to say how it happened. But with a boom! And I was pregnant.” He smiled, patting his round tummy.

“That is amazing.” One of the girls said.

“Yes, it was.” Benvolio nodded.

“And what did the father say when you told him? You know?” One of the girls, Rosaline, wanted to know eagerly.

Benvolio smiled broadly. “He said: ‘Benvolio, you can’t be.’”

“Benvolio, you can’t be.” They all turned around at the sound of the voice to see Romeo stand there, hands on his hips.

“Hush, that was my line!” Mercutio nearly yelled as he stepped next to his friend. Benvolio blushed.

“Ah, meet the ah er father.”  Was all the blonde could stammer.

“Of course! Mercutio’s the father. He’s so very fit!” One of the girls said.

“No, it must be Romeo. He’s always sleeping round town. Right Jules?” The girl who said it looked at another girl who blushed furiously.

Mercutio grabbed Benvolio’s hand. “Come on, let’s get out of here.” He tugged the boy along.

The famous trio ran and came to a halt in an alleyway, laughing loudly and clapping a hand on their knees. “Boy, you had them fooled.” Mercutio said, smiling.

“Come on. Let’s take that pillow out from underneath your clothes.” Romeo had his hands already on Benvolio’s chest but he pushed his hands away.

“There’s no pillow. Romeo.” Benvolio said, fluttering his eyelashes.

“What?” Romeo sounded exasperated.

“It’s yours.”

“What???”

Benvolio grinned mischievously.

And Mercutio laughed loudly into the night.

* * *

 

**Romeo Montague**

He sat with his hands in his hair, agony written over his face as he stared shamefully at his feet.

“Of all the people in the world!” It was his mother, Lady Montague, who stood towering over him, screeching as she pointed accusingly at him. “I had expected this from anyone but from my son.”

“Mother…” His voice was weak.

“Always the compassionate lover. Now you see what it gets you. How did it happen, son?” She looked at him like a cat ready to use her claws and he dared not look at her.

“It was, it happened so swift and it was like, well, boom, and I was pregnant.” He hung his head in shame, hearing his fiancée, who sat opposite of him, gasp.

“Romeo, tell me it’s a lie.” Dear Juliet cocked her head, her eyes pleading.

But how could he reply to that? He shook his head and bit his lip.

“Romeo, you know that this is virtually impossible, don’t you?” His fiancée tried again. “A man and a woman…”

“I know. I know.” Romeo glanced at her, then at his enraged mother.

“So? Who was it?” His mother demanded to know. “Who was the culprit?”

Romeo swallowed. Hard. Then, after a long and pregnant pause, he licked his lips and found his reply.

“Count Paris.”

Juliet looked at him horrified, but his mother gasped and smiled.

“Oh, but if it’s good Count Paris then we should not worry! Let the marriage be arranged instantly!” She stood up, being her overly cheerful self, and started ordering the servants to send Paris a letter, to inform the Prince of recent events and to arrange a ball to celebrate the upcoming marriage.

Juliet just pierced Romeo with her penetrating stare.

“Next time you come up with a lie,” She told him through gritted teeth, “Make sure it’s a better one.”

Only to be interrupted by the sing-song voice of Count Paris. “Ah, Romeo, darling, there you are.”

* * *

 

**Juliet Capulet**

“I’m pregnant.”

“What?” Romeo’s eyes grew large like plates.

“I’m with child.” She clarified.

“Yes, I got that the first time. Wow, Juliet this is just-“ His voice trailed off and a small smile tugged the corners of his lips. He pulled his girlfriend close and nuzzled her hair.

She let him and allowed for her muscles to relax for a while when she was in his embrace. The tension of telling him the news leaving her for a short-lived moment. It had been hard to break the news, mostly because she felt insecure about his reaction.

“It’s amazing, right?” She told him with her sweet angelic smile.

Romeo hummed in her hair. His eyes were filled with love when he looked up at her again. “How did it happen? When? Was it that time-?”

She didn’t let him finish his guesses and chuckled softly. “It was more like Boom! And I found myself pregnant. A great explosion. You know.”

“Ah yes, an orgasm.” Romeo said with a cheeky smile.

“An orgasm. Yes.” Juliet let herself relax against the couch.

“It was a good one.” Romeo muttered, trying not to boast.

“It was the best.” Juliet said with a smile. “And now I’m pregnant. What do you’ve got to say to that, eh?”

Romeo stretched his arms, letting go of his girlfriend, and smiled at her brightly. “Juliet, finally.”

She bit her lip. Red colouring her cheeks.

“I’ve waited so long for this. Now all we’ve got to do is tell our parents and-”

Juliet cut him short again. “You say that now, Romeo, but the truth is… this baby isn’t yours.”

Romeo froze.


End file.
